From healthcare strategy consultant to soul guide and healer, join me as I journey onto my soul path, find my voice and become even more of my authentic self. Learn how I blend the practical with the mystical as an empath, mom, a wife and a first generation Indian immigrant in the US who stumbled upon her psychic and healing gifts in the most unexpected way.
Dear soul friends - in this episode, I am here to help you acknowledge any grief you may harbor around unmet dreams, through my personal journey of experiencing this grief around my business. As I sit with these emotions, I honor them and the 'sacred inwardness' they bring. Together, my intention is to help you explore how to process these feelings, honor the ebb and flow of our journeys, and trust in the unfolding mystery of our paths. And my hope is that by sharing this part of my story, you’ll feel less alone in your own. I invite you to take a moment to breathe, reflect, and embrace the unfolding of our unique human journey.
Tap into Crystal Young's healing offerings for sensitives, as I mentioned (affiliate link): https://www.naturalstrengthhc.com/a/iykki
Highlights
“Grief around my business is an energy that wants to be here. It visits without fail. And this time, I thought I’d bring it to the forefront to share it with you all.”
“I want you to know you’re not crazy for dreaming a big dream or wanting a lot in your life. And you’re not crazy for finding it so hard to sit with the disappointment and absence of its presence here—like the dream is still a dream and not a reality. It can be crushing to see that.”
“Take time to acknowledge what’s within you. Pour yourself a cup of tea and maybe another for your grief. Let it sit with you, not to rush through but to honor the sacred inwardness of this phase.”
“Maybe you can allow yourself to recognize that too. Maybe you dared to believe and trust and just dream of a dream that many versions of you would have thought impossible. People around you would have considered unlikely to happen. That itself is a huge thing."
“It’s hard when the outcomes we envisioned don’t show up in the timeline we asked for. There’s something about manifestation that, when it happens, feels like a validation—a beautiful gift from the universe saying, ‘Here you go. You asked for this.’ And when it doesn’t happen, it’s heartbreaking.”
“I’m usually a fountain of ideas, but right now, I just feel like I need to slow down, pour myself a cup of tea, and hang out with the mystery.”
Thank you for receiving from your soul - if you feel called to go deeper, I invite you to feel into the links below:
Hello, today I want to talk to you all about the grief of not achieving your dreams, your hopes, your vision of success, your intention, your manifestations, whatever you may call that. I have personally been journeying through what seems to be a yearly visit from an old friend. As a lovely healer, crystal mirrored back to me recently. I highly recommend her. I'll put her link in my show notes. Highly recommend her. I'll put her link in my show notes.
Speaker 1:
She has a very multi-dimensional quality about her sessions. It flows. It allows me to bring up all parts of me. I feel like I can speak to my truth and not feel like I have to follow her structure. There's so much space for me to flow and that's big for someone who definitely has a wounding around being able to speak her truth. To be able to, in fact, just talking with you all in this way is so medicinal for me in some ways, because I didn't have this kind of space as a kid, as an adult, partly through conditioning, partly through the environment I was raised in and all the belief systems that that tends to bring up so well. I'm very grateful to be in this space with you all.
Speaker 1:
I it's also felt heavy. There's been so many things happening. You, if you've been tracking my episodes on this show I had posted some messages around the election and I had a certain outcome I was envisioning. That did not happen. I have been doing many things that I had certain outcomes I intended, envisioned, predicted. All of these things are true and they didn't quite happen. I may speak to those in more detail, but I think we can all relate to this experience of wanting something to happen in our life and not quite seeing it come true. And it can be hard and for me personally, I felt it. It has felt extremely hard on the front of business, because it's actually when I'm in the space with you all, which is what I term my spiritual, magical business.
Speaker 1:
Me, I am, all of me. I am logical, intellectual me, I am, spiritual me, I am magical, me I am. There are very few filters or guardrails in place. Yes, I have time boundaries and more, but you are getting a lot of me, a lot of my energy, and I feel so fully expressed in the space, I feel so fully understood. In this space I can allow myself to share things that I know would be deemed weird or unusual, like where else can I talk about like magical beings that showed up in a visual, and to me it makes sense and it's logical because I know I'm not logically thinking and all that comes out of my mouth actually all ties together and it makes sense. So, my god, magic is real. But I know we're all on a journey around that and for us, we are approaching goals that we are going after as this. Let me make the list, let me check off each item one by one and let me go after it.
Speaker 1:
I very much lived that life. For a long time. I had bought all the courses, the books that you name it. I had done it. I had done a lot of the one thing If you've heard of Michael Hyatt and like planning your best year ever not at all a plug for all those things these served me a little bit, but I wouldn't recommend those Just saying, for it never really honored all of me, it didn't allow for surprise and mystery, it was just like hammer through this list.
Speaker 1:
Is that even a phrase? Well, I made it one and if you do it right, if you do it all, if you do the right things, if you get it all done, you make it happen. You hustle, you work hard it will happen, and that maxim proved to be true for a good part of my life. I will say like I worked very hard to get into a top engineering college back in India, the IITs, which it was a dream come true, really. And, um, I met my husband a dream come true. It's not like the smoothest path there, but we figured it out and it happened. And I had a kid another dream come true.
Speaker 1:
There was a lot of like make it happen energy, especially when it came to education and work. I'm just breathing because I can feel like I lost my train of thought as I was explaining something, so let me go back to my notes and make sure I know where I am. Just take a moment to breathe with me as I settle back into what I remember saying was working hard meant I would achieve my goal, and so I assume that, yes, well, I'm building this business and sharing my gifts and allowing myself to be seen lots of chills down my legs as I say that and allowing myself to receive payment for it, like I can be paid to be me in this way. It's a dream I dare to believe, and that itself is a huge thing, so I'm just patting myself on the back and maybe you can allow yourself to recognize that too. Maybe you dare to believe and trust and just dream of a dream that many versions of you would have thought impossible, people around you would have considered unlikely to happen. And yet it shows to dream and feel that in my body, as I'm saying it, that that was a big step for me.
Speaker 1:
I dared to dream that this was a possibility. I took many steps to dared to dream that this was a possibility. I took many steps to get there, but somewhere along the way I thought if I do all the right things, if I check all the boxes, if I work hard enough not too hard, because, as a spiritual teacher, I'm not about hustling, I'm all about doing and being, and that wouldn't be embodying my truth and my values that I want to bring forth and at the same time, I've been doing and being on the right things. If I can say that and I'm not getting the results that I hoped for and dreamt of, and it's been a hard, bitter pill to swallow. And this friend of grief visits me every year. It's heartbreaking when it shows up, it is this feeling of like oh my gosh, can this ever happen?
Speaker 1:
Will this ever happen is hard to sit with, because I think unlike, say, when I try to achieve things at work or academically in school and college it was, there was kind of a path carved out like people had already walked this path, and people have walked this path of building spiritual businesses, and yet and people have walked this path of building spiritual businesses, and yet none of them are just, they're all their own people with their own path, and so I find it hard to use this concept of well, other people have done that, so I can do it too. I haven't tried to look at this from a business building standpoint, like there are people who are able to build a business and scale it monetarily, in impact and scope. To me, yes, there are those elements that are part of my dream, but the biggest element, I feel, is I just I get to be all of me like this and I have tears coming up as I say this like I have this, this. You know, I can be all of me. I can bring to what's coming through me, to me intuitively, and I don't have to shield or camouflage that when I'm at work or even with people and friends, like.
Speaker 1:
I'm like, careful to not go into a very intuitive place. Sometimes it just drops in, but for the most part I'm very boundaried around it, mostly because I don't want to say something without consent and there's so much guarding involved in my day-to-day. And where I can feel most expressed is when I'm by myself, maybe with this camera and microphone, with you all, um, but that's not how I want to live my life. I want to have fun and like be myself everywhere. Even if that's not how I learned to be, it's something I can learn, even as an adult. It tends to be harder, but I can do it. I know that. So I share all this.
Speaker 1:
To possibly awaken within you that's is always my intention with these episodes. Is that something that I am personally journeying through? The emotional signature of it, the ups and downs of it, may be something that you have experienced or are experiencing, and I trust that if there's this something you're moving through, that my episode finds you at the right time in the right place. Um, one to help you feel less alone. That, um, you're not crazy for dreaming a big dream or wanting a lot in your life, and you're not crazy for finding it so hard to sit with the disappointment and absence of its presence here, like the dream is still a dream and not a reality, and it's crushing to see that In many ways I take a step back to hey, you know, my business is still working in many, many ways.
Speaker 1:
It's not gone or dissipated or faint. It ebbs and flows in its energy. It has done that, I think, to allow for space for many other parts of my life, and so I I'm remembering that the ebb and flow. In fact, if you're a business owner, a spiritual business owner or a business owner who is very intuitively led and listening to this, I have my connect to my business spirit team workshop, as I designed it and called it exercise, in which I channeled a message just about this accepting and understanding the ebbs and flows of our businesses and really seeing it for what it's giving to us. It can be frustrating, but it can be a gift too. So I recommend you look that up on my website. I'll link to it below too, wherever you're listening to this and tuning in.
Speaker 1:
But I'm taking a moment to receive that message again for myself, because it's hard to tell in the moment, like why are all the results that I was hoping for not here? Why are the outcomes not here? I've done enough. I've done the right things. There's been enough logic, but also trusting the energetic flow, and I haven't put out a video or a message in some time now because I've been honoring my energy and all that's happening in my life too, and that's okay. But what I'm conscious of is this sensation in my throat of feeling underexpressed, of not being as much as I can be, and I feel like there is something about when your manifestation comes true. It's a validation, it's such a beautiful gift from the universe that says, hey, you asked for this and here it is. And isn't that so cool to experience when we've received those gifts from the universe in our life, and is it? It's so hard when those gifts don't present itself in the timeline that you asked for. So I see all this to again remind you you're not alone and that if you need to grieve, to take the time to grieve, if you need to be with your emotions, if that's journaling, if that's yelling into a camera, I have done that to processing with a trusted healer, therapist, coach, friend, family member. Please lean into that. There is so much power in being witnessed and it helps. It helps take the edge off, it helps accept it some more.
Speaker 1:
Many times I find difficult things can linger in our life, partly because we are pushing it aside and not really truly being with that energy and grief around my business is an energy that just it wants to be here. It visits without fail. I thought this year I may have staved it off for a while, but it's here and so I thought I'd bring it to the forefront. Just I'm here to express all of myself and this grief is a part of me and wants to be expressed and seen, and perhaps it invites the part of you that is also grieving a delay in maybe making a move happen. Maybe it's related to a job, maybe it's related to starting a family or taking a relationship to the next level. These are all journeys I have been on.
Speaker 1:
I have seen clients move through, and there are these moments where you're in this mysterious phase and it's hard to embrace the mystery of where is this all going. I know what I'm intending, I know my vision, but I don't know where this is headed and it can be so hard to be in that time, in that moment, um, when you, when we are often conditioned to be goal-oriented, to go after something, and then, after going after something, you're here, left with this energetic emptiness, wondering what's going to happen next. I don't know. I can be with emptiness for a while, I can be with the mystery for a while, but I'm finding personally that it's hard to wonder where what's next. I'm usually a fountain of ideas and often don't have enough time to um action on them all, and right now I'm just feeling this. I just need to slow down and pour myself a cup of tea, and probably another cup of tea for the grief within me, and we just get to hang out and acknowledge each other. We're here together Not a fun part of the human experience, but we have to honor.
Speaker 1:
When these phases come up. I find it's not one to push through or rush through, but there are the time of sacred inwardness, if I can call it that, taking the time to go within, taking the time to tune in. Perhaps there are parts of you that are waiting to be heard, in addition to the grief, the disappointment, the sadness, the hurt, whatever it might be, wherever your expectations may not have been met. I'm inviting you to be with those thoughts, maybe journal, maybe allow yourself to think about it as you're on your next drive, whatever feels right for you. Trust that you know how to process and move this energy and trust that, just by listening to all these words, that you've been with that energy in some ways and maybe it's ready to shift and visit you another day, or maybe it's like I'm done. Thank you for hanging out with me and not ignoring me.
Speaker 1:
I know, since I do a lot of inner child work and healing, that very often the part that comes up, that wants to achieve and do it, tends to feel like this 10 year old part within me that's like all right, we worked hard, we did all the things, it should happen, yes, and then is just baffled by what's going on and I can feel like she's really sad and I have to take the time to honor her sadness. Many times when we do spiritual work and we're in this exciting phase of I'm connecting to so much, I'm starting to astral travel I can feel this new energy or some new psychic development has happened. More often than not, it also requires grounding and rooting into your parts that are very often inner childlike, like how am I taking care of myself? Am I taking the time to have a long shower and bath? Am I listening to good music? Am I eating a good meal that feels healthy and hearty to my soul? Am I taking time to connect deeply with people around me? Am I just slowing down and just being so?
Speaker 1:
With all of that, I trust you received what you needed to from that message and I thank you for witnessing me through my own journey With much love and sending you so much comfort and many hugs. For whatever you're moving through, it's a time of great change and you might be feeling a lot, but I know you are energetically sensitive and deeply curious. So if you feel called to explore more deeply with me together on a journey, on a quest, as I like to call it, my books are open for sessions. Feel free to check that out at the links below as well on my website, nikijoshicom. And if you don't feel pulled to any of those and want to journey by yourself or with someone else. Thank you for trusting your inner knowing around that and I'm wishing you so much love and blessings for the rest of the season. May it serve you in a way that fills and lights up your soul and helps you learn even more about your true self. Thank you.
